My husband is transitioning from his career in the military, but isn’t working yet. We need a supplemental income, so we’ve decided that I look for work while he pursues changing career paths. We have a 5yo in kindergarten, a 3 yo and an infant. I’ve been offered two jobs. One is full time at minimum wage at a child development center working in the infant room. I would be able to have my youngers attend the center at little cost. I would be finished working in time to pick up the kindergartner and be home in the evenings. Yet, the second job sounds so good for me. I would work 20 hours a week, but make more money overall. The catch is the second job is 4-8pm Monday-Friday because I would be developing an after-school program. So that would mean being gone every weeknight evening. I feel really torn between what to do. We need a second income but one job would be full-time and require me to pay for some child care while the second I would work only part-time hours and make more money. What should I do? Is it too much to be gone every evening? My husband is a good dad, but making dinner and doing baths and bedtime every night might be a lot.
Here’s my take:
- I have to prep/cook dinner by 2pm this way it’s ready for my husband and kids
- You’ll miss eating dinner with your kids and husband
- You’ll have some clean up after work unless your hubby is a beast and can manage dinner, cleaning, bath time and bed time!
You and your husband need to sit down and establish your goals. If you need more money to get out of debt or for your current lifestyle then perhaps the job that makes the most money makes sense, you’ll just have to sacrifice the time with your family to complete your goal. That’s okay and that happens.
Envision your future and realize that this is temporary, that’s how I got through my full time evening job. I knew it wasn’t a forever thing. And honestly, I would never have done it if I was away from home during the evenings. I was blessed to be able to work from my home office so I could take breaks to sneak in bed time kisses and clean up the kitchen before the end of my shift.
Establish clear roles for yourself and your husband. If you do take the evening job let him know what that he needs to be able to handle, the bed time, dinner and bath time. Make sure he is comfortable with taking this on and figure out ways to help-prepping dinner in advance, offering to do all the clean up after work, etc. I think setting clear roles will reduce fights on who is supposed to be doing what. I have recently reduced the amount of evening hours I work and now enjoy the week nights home with my kids and husband. I am grateful though, that the evening hours worked for that season in our family life.
What do you think, can you offer some advice to this mama?
Check out what the Ask Away Thursday blogging team came up with here:
Rachel-Don’t Call Me Supermom
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